When you're a child, there's not much keeping you from being your genuine self. You are authentically expressing yourself with every fiber in your body. You speak your mind. You know who you are and who you want to be.
Now you're all grown up and in an effort to fit in, you filter most of what comes out of your mouth to the point that you've censored your thoughts too. You're not sure who you are anymore, or who you want to be.
How can you expect to live your life, your purpose, put the real you out in the world if you don't know who you are?
Scary thought, right? Don't worry, I got you.
Even if you are obviously more than words can ever say, here are 5 fun tricks to help you figure out who you are today.
1. Your Best Self In Three Simple Words
Bring out your notebook - or your smartphone - and write what you like about yourself. All and everything. Don't be shy. Don't be afraid of repetition either. Like my friend Mandy Bronsil says, "clues are in repetition".
Out of those adorable traits, circle three you could never do without. They are just too important to you. These words describe who you want to be recognized as most.
This group of three words, my friend, is your zone of brilliance.
2. What Your 11 Year Old Self Knew
An 11 year-old will have his or her mind decided on who he or she wants to be as a grown-up.
Do you remember who you wanted to be? Who you projected yourself to be?
If you don't remember, ask a parent, a cousin, a sibling or anyone who would've been around at that time.
How far off are you today? How does your childhood dream reflect into your adulthood choices?
Sort "your" adult choices - the major life crossroads - in two columns. On the left, list the "I decided by myself" choices, and on the right, the "I did what I was encouraged to do" choices.
Notice why and how you've come to this now.
3. Your Ideal Life on One Page
Write your own eulogy. A eulogy is what is said at one's funeral. It's depressing, I know, but it is an amazing way to find out what you want your life to be and how you want to be remembered.
Pretend you're your best friend - or your own daughter/son - and write a one-page eulogy you hope will be read at your funeral. What would he or she say about you?
What are the key traits and gifts you hope to leave behind? It could be one or two things, or ten. Dream big.
Remember, clues are in repetition. Is there anything that came up in tricks 1 and 2, coming up again here?
4. Five Values & Beliefs
On a fresh page. What traits do you most appreciate in others? What makes you emotional - triggers you? What creates a reaction in your body? Could be jealousy and anger, or disgust, or tears of joy. Anything really. If you find this exercise too hard, think back to the last time you cried or were angry - think about the kind of things you like to see on your feed and things that make you emotional.
If your reaction is negative to something, think about what the opposite of that trigger is.
Group these traits and triggers into five themes. These traits and triggers are likely to be inspirational to you. They create a reaction because they resonate with a deep value or belief.
Values and beliefs are a big part of who you are, of how you make decisions and choices, and how you put yourself out there.
5. Your Life Purpose In Five Minutes
Adam Liepzig introduced this absolutely awesome trick to know your life purpose - who you are, what you do - in less than five minutes.
Here's how you do it:
All you have to do is answer these questions one by one, and then group it all in one sentence.
What is your first name?
What do you love to do - write, cook, design, write code, talk, teach ? Out of these, what is the one thing that, right now, you feel qualified to teach others?
Who do you do it for?
What do they want or need? Why do they come to you for it?
How do they change or transform as you help them?
Group all that together into one sentence and you have your purpose statement. This is who you are, what you do. Your purpose.
Here's his video if you're interested.
Why You're Afraid to Be You
Now that you've got a good idea of who you are, you may be stuck at "how do I put myself out there?". Well, my question to you is "why haven't you put yourself out there yet?"
Why are we so afraid to be the real us? Why do we keep ourselves from speaking our minds?
Rendez-vous next week Friday for some answers!
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